In as much as I dislike white people speaking on behalf of black and brown people, I feel much the same when it comes to men speaking on behalf of women.
The simplest way for any person to get to know another and to discover their likes and dislikes or their needs and wants is to ask. Don’t presume to know what the person would need, just ask them.
Of course, if life consisted of “mindful” people, who cared about humanity, racism would not exist. This I know and am aware of.
Years ago, husbands would buy their wives kitchen appliances for their birthdays. Now I don’t know about you, but if my husband brought along a washing machine on my birthday, proudly telling me that it’s for me, I would either use it only to wash my clothes (seeing as it is mine) or go around the house wishing the house a happy birthday. After all, it is an item bought for the house and not for my exclusive use. Hairdryers, makeup or anything I can use is an appropriate birthday present.
It’s problematic when women are not heard or validated and are infantilized and treated as nothing but little girls waiting for “dad” to “rescue them.”
The world over we find men talking about women, to women and what they feel women should be doing including having autonomy over our bodies.
Men are in charge of all aspects of women and their lives. They are the administrators in education, the bosses at work, and the doctors who we go to regarding our health and reproductive rights, the ministers we listen to in religious institutions and the list goes on.
Sadly, when women are troubled or misunderstood and maybe needing guidance, it’s a man we have to go to.
Men make decisions, consulting other men about everything to do with women and girls. Women are in a secondary role and the only time women occupy a primary role in men’s lives is when they are still boys; dependant on the women in their lives.
The world is run by men who are more interested in power and money and are slaves to their egos.
Unfortunately with all and every decision made by men, all women are relegated to be, are girls.
And as is the case of a dad, who has a little girl, he will consult everyone and do everything but talk to the girl about her needs, wants, desires and ambitions, often rendering the women to a girl status unable to take care of anything by herself.