Hear ye! Hear ye! Hear ye!
Sound the trumpets as loud as can be
There’s a special guest at dinner
It sounds as if our son picked a winner
Bring out the best crockery.
Lest we are considered a mockery
Of a girl our son is in love with
We hope it’s not someone with a wide girth
He won’t say much
And seems to brush
Off the eager questions, we pose
About the love that suddenly arose
From out of nowhere, it seems, he settled down
And found the woman who turned his frown
Into a smile and laughter, he enjoys more
She must be spectacular for sure
Wait, surely this can’t be her cause she’s not white!
Something about this ain’t right!
Her lips are too big.
Her hair is wild, and is that an Afro or a wig?
My dear boy, have you gone crazy?
Is your eyesight hazy?
Can you see she’s on the dark side
No amount of English can hide
The fact that she is not one of us
Best you put her on the first bus
Out of sight so we can explain
Why it’s wrong and is a shame
Let me parade some blond, blue-eyed women you can date
Surely that way, there will be less hate?
Directed at you precious son
For choosing the right one
Does she know how to eat with a knife and fork?
And how to uncork
The wine we may have for dinner tonight
She seems to be a sight
To behold, let’s look at her front teeth
We’ll know for sure by her speech
Can she speak as we do?
Or butcher the language too.
Let’s stare as she takes her first slurp
And hear if there would be a loud burp
Coming from her because she lacks
What we know, and that’s a fact.
How could you bring this shame to our door?
Thinking her colour doesn’t matter is your biggest flaw
Son, we love you and want only the best
But this is putting our love for you to the test.
Look how she stands and sways.
She’s a loose woman who will surely betray
You because you know they have no morals
And most tend to sit on their laurels
Expecting you to work while she does nothing
Oh, she’s working? Well, that’s at least something
Less to worry about for now
We still can’t figure out how
You intend to make this work because you’re not the same
And love is not a game
You could get harmed by being with her
Let’s hope this relationship ends with dinner.