Many years ago, I left this old country in search of my true calling in this life. I cannot recall how many years flew by.
But to my mind, I just had to leave; it felt as if something was chasing me away from there or someone was driving me away.
But somehow, though, I had a good life over there where I stayed. Somehow I always felt a sense of deep guilt, and that guilt began to haunt me like a ghost of yesteryear.
It felt as if I betrayed the old country and friends that I had- as if I had absconded my duties towards them.
Nothing could wash away the guilt!
It was like a sword hanging over me! Even my soul was drowning in the dark, broody river!
Then one day, I decided to return to the old country. Mother Nature looked at me as if I was a stranger. It felt as if heavens wrath came down upon me
– with its violent storms and raging, unforgiving winds.
My friends had begun to ridicule me as if I did something wrong.
They all interrogated me.
Yes, I had changed while they were still living in a time of celebration- a celebration where anything goes. In truth, I never judged them, because it wasn’t my place to do so.
Then I returned home, but in truth, I still felt that guilt. I guess I thought I did my best.
I washed the sand off my shoes and vowed never to return. It is one closed chapter never to be opened again.
Yes, I am still searching for my true calling in this life. Who knows where I will land up!
