I walk amongst you, but you don’t even recognize me. All that you see is this broken shadow of a man.

His tattered clothes drape the very ground that he walks upon. Not even a shimmering light shines forth from those once pale blue eyes.

The shoes he wears are so broken that it belongs at a rubbish dump or in rat-infested bins.

His once sparkling white veneers are now tainted in years of old cheap tobacco. 

Yes, life was good to me. I also once lived a prestigious life where everything was handed to me on some gold platter.

.

I treated man with the utmost scorn because I thought no man was better than me.

But I was wrong in judging and pointing that proverbial finger at them.

I even dined with man of note.

Today those very men laugh behind my back. They don’t even feel pity for me. There is no compassion in their eyes for me. 

Now I live in a river of dark, murky water with no resurrection or parole. It is like a lifelong death sentence hanging over me.

I am waiting for my executioner to end it, but he is taking forever.

There is no dawn or not even a hint of a ray of sunlight in my daily life. My once strong bones are now aching with the ultimate pain.

No painkiller can ease the pain, no matter how many I take. In my mind, I always thought that I had an image or status to look up to.

I began to judge and criticize men even though I didn’t know them and never will.

I guess, in my mind, that was my ultimate

downfall in this life.

True, I wanted men to admire me and praise me for how far I came in this life, and for my tertiary education, it was only Lynn, the best. But what did all my degrees bring me in this life? I guess absolutely nothing.

My whole life revolved around looking down on others. Yes, now I have become one bitter and depressed human being. 

Indeed I am that shadow.